Let’s be honest: if Parts Work had a slogan for beginners, it would be:
“Am I doing this right… or am I just making stuff up?”
If you’ve ever sat in an IFS session, heard your therapist ask:
“What does this part want to tell you?”
…and your brain responded with absolute radio silence — congrats. You’re not broken. You’re human.
Why Is It So Hard to “Hear” Your Parts?
Most of us think “hearing” means words. Sentences. A neat reply like a character in a TV show.
But here’s the truth: Parts don’t always talk. They feel. They show. They poke you with a body sensation. Sometimes they send a random memory or just sit there being a stubborn blank wall. That is communication.
Think of it like learning a new language. At first, you don’t understand the words. But you start catching on to gestures, tones, feelings. That’s exactly how your parts “talk” to you.
Common Beginner Block #1: “I’m Making This Up”
This is a classic. That little voice saying:
“I’m just imagining this. This can’t be real.”
Spoiler: That voice is a part. A Skeptic Part. Its job is to protect you from disappointment, getting it wrong, or feeling foolish.
Instead of fighting it, do this:
🗣️ Ask the Skeptic Part to step back a little.
Or…
🗣️ Get curious about the Skeptic Part itself. What is it scared of? What does it need? Ironically, by being curious about the block, you’re already doing Parts Work.
Common Beginner Block #2: Blankness & Silence
No words. No images. Just… a void.
That might be because:
- A part is protecting access to deeper feelings (protectors often do that).
- You’re “trying too hard” from a thinking, rational place.
- Your system needs more safety & trust to open up.
🔑 Tip: Soften the effort. Instead of “demanding an answer,” just notice.
- Do you feel tension somewhere?
- Is there an emotion lingering?
- Is there even a sense of “numbness” somewhere in your body?
That numbness might be a part too.
The Real Secret: It’s Not Always Words
Most communication from parts is non-verbal:
- A tight chest = a part holding fear.
- A sudden heaviness = a burdened part.
- An image popping into your mind = a part sharing its memory.
- A shift in mood = a part stepping forward.
Instead of “translating” body sensations into words right away, just sit with them. Get curious. Be patient. Often, more will be revealed.
Pro Tip: Establish a “Yes or No” Pattern with Your Body
If you’re feeling stuck, try this simple yet powerful hack:
👉 Ask your system to establish a physical signal for YES and NO.
For example:
- “Show me a YES.” Notice what sensation comes up. Maybe a twitch, a subtle movement, a feeling.
- “Show me a NO.” Again, observe your body.
For me, a YES is a twitch on my upper lip.
A NO is a twitch on my lower lip.
It’s been consistent for years.
You can even request something fun like:
- An itch on your right cheek for YES.
- An itch on your left cheek for NO.
Sounds silly? Trust me — it works. Your subconscious loves giving you clues in subtle, somatic ways. It’s like giving your inner parts a buzzer system. This builds confidence because you have a clear, reliable way to “hear” them. Over time, this can evolve into a strong, intuitive dialogue.
Beginner-Friendly Practice:
Here’s a gentle approach for getting parts to speak in their own way:
- Pause & breathe. Imagine you’re hosting a tea party for your inner committee.
- Ask softly: “Who wants my attention right now?”
(No pressure, just asking.) - Notice: Any feeling? Tension? Image? Emotion?
- Acknowledge what comes — even if it’s doubt, blankness, or resistance.
- Use your Yes/No body signals for simple questions.
- Trust first impressions. The “random” thoughts are often the part’s whispers.
Remember:
- You’re not “failing” if you don’t get words.
- Parts don’t perform on command.
- The more you meet them with curiosity, the more they trust you.
- Body signals (yes/no) are your secret ally.
Parts Work isn’t a quiz with right or wrong answers. It’s more like meeting a bunch of shy, quirky inner characters…
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You already know you’re meant for more. But knowing isn’t enough when sabotage keeps slowing you down.
Every day you stay stuck is a day your next level stays on hold. If you’re done spinning in circles, there’s a simple way to move forward without the overwhelm.
👉 For the easiest way to beat self-sabotage at its roots, text “MME” to +1 (830) 205-0050 for immediate access.
